I'm pretty sure what follows can be classified as "ranting"

To date, I have not shared a certain deep, abiding love with all of you. This wasn't intentional; it's just never come up. But it's something I hold dear to my heart because a) I love it and b) it always means special time with Joe.

It's The Biggest Loser.

That's right. Every Tuesday night, we watch strangers exercise, sweat and lose weight while we create deeper indentations in the couch cushion. (Side note: I don't know what it is but watching the show always makes me want to eat. I'm confident this is not intended by the producers.)

But I'm breaking my silence because last night's episode pushed me over the edge in two categories:

1. Forced, awkward product placements
2. Vicky

Issue #1: forced, awkward product placements.

Um, NBC? After watching 3.2 minutes of The Biggest Loser, I get that you are sponsored by Extra gum, Subway and Jello. Trust me, I get it.

There's no need to have a contestant who used to subsist on Big Macs and slabs of ice cream to pop in a piece of gum and declare in delight, "Oh, this really hits the spot. This 5-calorie stick of gum really satisfies my sweet tooth."

(If you don't watch the show, please know I did not make up those lines. Someone actually said that verbatim.)

Now, I'll agree that the person was OK and even thrilled to forgo sweets because they are losing weight like crazy. But I'll give them credit for utilizing self-control for not devouring an entire batch of brownies and eating that stick of gum instead.

And I'm almost ready to throw in my couch-potato towel if I hear Subway's $5 foot-long song one more time.

Issue #2: Vicky.

Now, I'm promised myself to never speak poorly of someone on my blog. I don't want this to become a negative spot which was why I didn't mention some of the more interesting events from election day. (If you know me, ask me because I can dish out some good, non-fiction draaa-MA!) But I can't keep silent anymore.

I love this show because even though it's a TV game with some game-play, people really are there to become healthy and change their lives. However, Vicky is just plain mean.

If I was live-blogging the episode last night, it would have gone something like this:

• What?
• No, she didn't. No, she didn't!
• How can someone be so mean?
• Seriously. Bob! Speak up and tell her how mean she is!
  
• My palms are sweating. Could Brady really be gone tonight?!
• Please, oh, please, oh please, LEAVE!
• Did you all SEE that look on her face??
  

It would have been so educational for all of you.

I really don't want to resort to bad-mouthing someone on my blog. I really don't because this is intended to be a sweet spot to share my joys in motherhood. So I'll just say this:

Vicky is controlling, manipulative, mean, bossy, smug, mean, on the show for all the wrong reasons, tactless, mean a contestant on The Biggest Loser.

Don't worry; last night's episode didn't ruin the whole season for me. (Amy P. saw to that!) I will be tuning in next week, especially since the preview commercial promised: "You haven't seen Vicky lose control like this before!"

Ooooh, I'll be watching, NBC. With my Jello pudding cups, Subway $5 foot-long sub and pan of brownies a stick of Extra gum, I will be watching.