Are you ready for some random?

This week has definitely been better than the last two weeks. 

For starters, I experienced the Goodwill Outlet. I cannot say “went to” or “shopped at” and anything other than “experienced” because when you go, it is an experience. Huge bins are rolled in and piled high with junk and junk and junk and maybe, possibly glorious treasure. I’ve wanted to go for a long time but was too intimidated to go by myself.

So I went with Erin because her fingertips have reached into the bins and pulled out American Girl dolls, complete Calico Critter sets, Anthropologie clothes and bars of gold. (OK, one of those was a lie. If only she had found some critters…) We didn’t discover much that morning other than the need to hang out again soon because 1. I just really like her and 2. Madeline loved running around with her son, Clark.

(Sidenote: I’ve been watching a British period drama called “Lark Rise to Candleford.” When we drove away from the Outlet, Madeline said, “Hey Mom? You know your show? Let’s call it ‘Clark Rise to Candleford.’” And then she laughed hysterically at her own joke. Double sidenote: I LOVE THIS KID.)

Even though I didn’t find much, I definitely want to go back. Because of the possibilities, you guys. OH THE POSSIBILITIES.

Last week, a neighbor's tree fell down and landed partly in our yard. Because Madeline was outside with Joe when it started to fall and also because this girl thrives on solid, dramatic storytelling, she recounts the ordeal to anyone who comes in contact with her. 

In her mind, she was on the Titanic with Leo and survived to tell the tale.

Last night, Joe and I had a rare, rare date night. I won tickets from The Life of a Home Mom for a Cirque du Soleil show. I’ve always wanted to see one of these shows but since I have no interest in ever going to Vegas or never spend big bucks on shows, my chances of going were slim to nil. But then I won! So Very Excited.

We had dinner at Bru Burger before the show. I know I often wax poetic about food but you guys. It was so so so good. Everything was good. The burger. The fries. The kicky homemade ketchup. We ate so much which was probably a bad choice given that we were about to go watch some of the world’s most fit human beings. Pretty sure none of them overate on fries that night.

Then we waddled and shuffled our stuffed bellies to the show where I sat for the next two hours with sweaty palms and an open mouth. If you ever get the chance to see a Cirque show, GO. It was incredible. It was more intense/crazy/acid trip-y than I was expecting but it was also even more amazing than I anticipated. 

If nothing else, Cirque showed me how truly amazing the human body is and how very capable it can be. It also reminded me that I'm capable of doing more than sitting on my couch eating Oreos but that's for another day.

I brought the camera with me and had every intention of getting one good photo of Joe and I because my hair was straightened and I was wearing a dress but the night slipped away from me. So here's a picture of Pocahontas on Father's Day at the IMA.

Caleb is feeling better but is also backed up. As in prunes and prune juice are a necessity. I made a Target run yesterday and my cart had only pureed prunes, prune juice, diapers, laundry detergent, bleach and mayo. I have never felt more like a mom. (The mayo is because I need my Friday lunch tuna fish sandwich because I’m adventurous like that.)

Once home, he wasn’t a fan of his first prunes but he LOVED making a mess to communicate his dislike.

Jen, this was after I hung up with you. I said he was messy!

Madeline wanted to pray before dinner tonight. This was her prayer:

Dear Jesus,

Help Caleb get off his medicine.

Help Mommy eat milk and mac and cheese again.

Help Uncle Jason's back feel better.

Help Aunt Courtney get the baby out.

Amen.

Amen indeed, especially for Courtney.

And finally, this might be the funniest blog post I've ever read. Please enjoy.

Nap Time in Naptown: New Lakeshore Learning Store in Indianapolis

When I made the decision to homeschool Madeline, three of my friends (who all were teachers before staying home with their kids) told me I needed to check out Lakeshore Learning. I had never even heard of Lakeshore which isn't surprising since my only role during Madeline's preschool year was chauffeur and snack buyer and I'm just now venturing into teacher mode. (Hold me.)

However, I think Lakeshore might have my conversations bugged because a few weeks ago, they emailed me to see if Madeline wanted to try out some of their products. This means in addition to knowing I'm about to homeschool, they also know my deep feelings on Essie's Fiji color and my giddy anticipation for "Big Brother" and the Olympics.

Of course I said yes and picked out the Operations Magnetic Activity Board because our library has the magnetic counting maze and Madeline LOVES playing with it. (This says a lot because the library also has touch-screen computers with Dora the Explorer games.)

Ever since Madeline opened the box and began playing with the board, she has called it her math toy and I'm not about to correct her. She may be learning addition and subtraction but to her, she's just playing with her toy. 

I love it too because all the pieces are contained (a.k.a. no threat to our resident "everything goes in the mouth" baby) and the 15 double-sided mats mean Madeline is thoroughly entertained for a looooong time while I clean the kitchen or feed Caleb. I also like that she will grow with the board because some of the mats are too advanced right now with multiplication and division.

I'm a fan of using manipulatives when learning math so I'd love to get Madeline some cute counters to go with this.

Lakeshore just opened a new store here in Indianapolis in May (on 86th St. in Nora, for you fellow locals) and we checked it out after my friends said to go, well before Lakeshore contacted me. Madeline wanted to buy everything we saw and honestly I did too. They have everything a little school-loving heart could hope for. 

Also, if you need to a bribe while shopping at Nora's Whole Foods or Target, Lakeshore hosts free crafts every Saturday from 11 a.m. - 3 p.m. Not that you would ever bribe your kids for good behavior. No, of course not.

Disclaimer: I hope you know I'm pretty picky when it comes to reviews. I say no to a lot but said yes to Lakeshore because of the stellar recommendations from my friends and because it fits in naturally with my all-consuming thoughts on "oh my word how do I homeschool in two months??". They sent me the board for free but all opinions are mine.

A good ecard can turn a bad mood

If I had to describe myself right now in a picture, this would be it:

The past two weeks have been tough. Caleb has been fussy and not sleeping or eating well which means I've been fussy and not sleeping well. 

I can't say I haven't been eating well though because I'm a stress-eater. I discovered that Oreos are diary-free and today included Taco Bell. So I can't complain in that regard.

We think his gums are hurting and more teeth are incoming based on the fact that he wants to gnaw on everything while screaming. It's just made for some very long nights and days recently and I absolutely could not survive without my Joe. I know he could survive without my mood swings but I'm thankful he still loves me.

I know people say to soak up every minute of your kids while they're young. I agree with this statement 93 percent of the time. But can we all be honest that some days are meant for forgetting? Angie tweeted my thoughts exactly.

Preach on, sister.

In the midst of the crying and sleepless nights, we've been trying harder than ever to soak up summer. 

The last two weeks have also been splash park and pool with friends.

It's been chalk drawings and porch readings of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and "Mary Poppins Comes Back."

It's been bike rides with Daddy, scraped knees and the inability to escape the fussiness.

The last two weeks also included a very belated birthday party with a couple friends since we did Disney instead of a party back in May. Madeline picked the menu and it was only items I say no to normally: Little Caesar's pepperoni pizza, Danimals, Cheetos and Kool-Aid. And sour gummie worms in a dirt cake. 

I also just have to include this. Madeline won 909 tickets on a Wheel of Fortune game at a giant Chuck E Cheese-esque place. Her squeals of joy as the machine just kept endlessly spitting out tickets were PRICELESS and I just wish we had it on video.

Don't be fooled by the pictures. This hasn't been Happy Mommyland over here and my meltdowns are timed precisely when Joe walks through the door. 

But this week, I'm going to attempt to pull myself back together and no longer burst into tears when I can't find the library copy of "Wimbledon" which I just KNOW is somewhere in my living room. (True story. Sad but true.) 

More sleep would be great but I'm also just going to dig deep and try hard if sleep isn't in the cards this week. We'll see how this goes.

Caleb is seven months old

I’ve been grinning deliriously at this face for seven months now.

He weighs 18 pounds and nine ounces. His fat thighs are my favorites to grab and kiss. Most days, I just put him in a shirt and forgo shorts so I can squeeze the living daylight out of them.

He chows down oatmeal and sweet potatoes. He hated peas and green beans. He accidentally sucked on a popsicle. You better believe he looooooooved that.

He has four teeth and my fingers have learned they are all sharp. Also, he has a strong jaw. (Just ask my fingers.)

He is strong and healthy and I’m so thankful to God for that every day.

He does not sleep through the night. We have had some very long nights together but there is a special baby tenderness that comes out with the moon and I treasure seeing that. (Related: I am very, very tired this month.)

He thoroughly exhausts me but when I see him sleeping, I want to scoop him up, kiss the thighs and hold him close.

He is HAPPY. He is such a happy baby and grins, grins, grins all the time. Most of the grins include a tongue hanging out a smidgen.

He LOVES his daddy. I wish you could see how his face lights up when Joe comes through the front door every evening,

He is ticklish and we have a lot, a lot of fun with it.

He adores his big sister. As soon as he is strapped in his car seat, he stretches his necks as much as he can to see her. I revel in their friendship and their giggles.

He makes a weird gargling noise all the time and it is just the cutest sound I’ve ever heard.

He fights his diaper changes now. Those are fun times.

He is thisclose to crawling but his chunky thighs keep getting in the way. He manages to get where he wants by a combination of scotching, shifting and turning.

He is my water baby. The kid loves to splash in the bath and in the pool. He is not a fan of the surprises that come with splash parks.

I still can’t believe I have a 7-month old son named Caleb. He gives me an incredible amount of joy and a big, squishy amount of real estate to kiss and squeeze.

My Rapunzel and Sweet Potato Face

Today we visited a dear friend of mine who I used to work with a lifetime ago. This was back when the first hour of work was showing up to an office downtown wearing heels, checking emails and then walking across the street to Borders for coffee with some people I really, really liked. Sometimes we called this a meeting. 

Sometimes, we didn't even pretend.

Man, work was tough. And remember those stores called Borders? They were lovely but so 2005.

Anyways, Madeline chose not to come with me but Rapunzel did. (I'm not sure where her neck went but I promise she still has one.)

This Rapunzel has Rapunzel everything. Here we go.

1. Rapunzel dress
2. Rapunzel hair
3. Rapunzel bag
4. Rapunzel baby doll
5. Rapunzel Barbie
6. Rapunzel sunglasses
7. Rapunzel pillow book

Pretty certain this list constitutes purple, hairy overload.

Last June, Madeline spent her birthday money at Mass Ave Toys but wanted on spend part of it on Baby Rockne. (My word! We called Caleb "Rockne!" Remember that?? So weird to think of him as Rockne now.)

Joe and I kept saying she did not have to spend her money on a gift, that is was perfectly fine to spend it on herself. She INSISTED. She bought the baby a bib with a fire truck. (Her money, her choice.)

So this is why I'm near tears every time Caleb wears this bib.

I love my kids and their love for each other.

Also? This picture solidifies Madeline's femininity. The girl loves an arm-reached self-portrait.

P.S. Wanna see what Madeline looked like at the exact same age as Caleb now? In the same high chair? Being equally adorable?

OH THE CUTENESS. Oh, my heart.

Nap Time in Naptown: Mom’s Valet at Chick-fil-A at The Crossing

I can tell you the first Chick-fil-A I ate at because one opened up in The Atrium at Ball State University and everyone was freaking out in excitement and I didn’t understand why.

Growing up as a vegetarian will make you ignorant of all things meat.

But I learned quickly to love their waffle fries. Then I started dating Joe and a short time later, I fell in love with him and bacon and became a full-fledged carnivore.

Fast-forward 10 years and I still love Chick-fil-A because a) of everything on the menu and b) I have two small kids.

I don’t think I need to wax poetic about all the menu items (mini chicken biscuits! sweet tea! spicy chicken sandwich!) or why it’s is awesome for kids (playgrounds! placemats! books!). I think you probably already get it and love it and frequent it just like me.

But after today, I have yet another reason to go every day but Sunday to my favorite Indy location, Chick-fil-A at The Crossing. (As the great non-WillFerrell so wisely once tweeted, “It is a scientific fact that the human body craves Chick-fil-A even more on Sunday.” Oh preach it, Fake Will.)

My Chick-fil-A, which I generously share with others, started a Mom’s Valet program yesterday. It's a new way to dine fast food and I wonder if I’ll ever be the same.

Here’s the breakdown: place your order through the drive-through (and tell them everything you will need: condiments, number of chairs, high chairs, etc), park the sweet minivan, and by the time you wrangle your herd into the restaurant, you will find a table with your name and your order sitting RIGHT THERE ON A TABLE.

Shut the front door, Dorothy. You’re not in Kansas anymore.

I’m pretty sure this is the exact same set-up when manna rained down from the heavens.

No more first-world problem of waiting in line, then snagging a table, only to leave said table full of kids with Flubber on their soles, then speed walk back up to the counter to pick up your order. On 82 Street, your food will just magically appear.

Oh, Chick-fil-A. You had me at “hello, waffle fries” but now you just keep on reeling me in by the belt loop of my mom jeans.

I love you.

I’d drive a cow-spotted minivan for you.

Forever and always, KJM + CFA.

XOXOXOXO

Disclosure: In no way was I paid, stuffed with waffle fries or compensated in any way to write this. They have no idea who I am other than the lady with the screaming baby and girl who preferred bare feet today. We just went there for ice cream and were “valeted” and I just had to share this life-changing news. And if you think convenience isn’t life-changing for parents, who do you think keeps Jimmy Johns online ordering and delivery operating?

Another post wherein I list what I couldn't eat

I’m writing this post while watching “The Bachelorette.” So if you read an “Emily” or “Kalon” or “I was about to go all West Virginia on him” in the middle of a sentence, now you know why.

Our weekend was unusually packed and it was a barrel o’ fun. The most defining part and my favorite was discovering “The Pitch.” Have you all seen this? It’s addicting, my new equivalent to barbecue kettle chips. Janna told me about it over Memorial Day but we just now watched it. Oh my. We watched two episodes on Saturday night, tried to fall asleep but couldn’t so we watched one more. We stayed up until 1:30 a.m. Not our smartest move ever but it sure was fun.

Another favorite but not smartest move was drinking an entire gallon of homemade sweet tea. It tastes so good when it hits the lips. (Name that movie.)

On Friday night, Madeline and I had a pint-size girls night out, our first since Caleb was born. We sat at the high table in McDonald’s and went to the Fever game. We had so much fun.  

For four and a half years, this was all I saw in my backseat. Oh, how I love that little face.

As soon as we sat down, Madeline asked for cotton candy. I didn’t say no. (And I so desperately wanted to point that fact out to her but I bit my tongue.)

I didn’t realize this when I bought the tickets but we sat in the exact same section as our first game two years ago and I’m 99 percent confident we sat by the exact same people. The same LOUD people. Madeline loved watching them chant and tried to keep up. When they screamed, “Get it, get it, jump ball,” she turned to me and asked, “Why are they saying “giggy giggy Dumbo?”

We planned to go to PBS Kids in the Park because Madeline had seen a commercial for it only about 97 giggy giggy Dumbo times. We had every intention of getting there as soon as it started to avoid the long lines.

This plan did not come to fruition.

It started at 10 a.m. but we arrived around noon, when the sun was the highest and hottest. The lines were out to the streets. Basically, it was AWESOME.

But this little girl had a blast and we did get some Chick-Fil-A coupons out of it. Totally worth it.

We came home and took naps because the fun was not over. We headed to Blake’s birthday party which has been on Madeline’s social calendar forever. She’s literally been counting down the days to this party. Several weeks ago, she went to the Disney Store with Peter and reported back to me that she found Blake’s present. It was “the bad guy’s sword from ‘Be Brave.’” (That’s what she calls the latest Pixar movie, “Brave,” which I can’t wait to see, by the way.)

Well, we finally went back to the mall to get his present but I didn’t just find a sword. Oh no, it was an entire arsenal.

Holy weaponry, Batman!

I sent that picture to Jenn. I could not give this to her son (and essentially her other innocent children) without her approval. She’s a cool mom who said yes. Madeline could hardly wait for Blake to open it. I hope he enjoys it. I hope Jenn doesn’t hate me.

The party was at our favorite splash park and I wistfully sniffed Joe’s piece of Costco cake. I’m adding Costco cake to the ever-growing Post-Weaned list.

You better believe we came back home, put the kids to bed and watched another episode of “The Pitch.”

Sunday was church, cranberry almond chicken salad, chalk hopscotch, so many perfect summer moments. Our Sunday movie night choice was “The Absent-Minded Professor.” Did you watch this when you were little? I remember laughing hysterically at it. I was so happy when Madeline laughed her head at the flying basketball players. Also, I believe it's part of my parental responsibility to raise a child who likes black and white movies.

Then we headed over to Greg’s house for a family dinner. His bachelor pad is perfect for just him but also perfect when the other eleven of us invade, including two babies.

Greg made Special-K loaf. That is also going on the Post-Weaned list. Jenny made The Pioneer Woman’s chocolate sheet cake. I wanted to bathe in the icing but thought that might be inappropriate. It should be obvious at this point that cake is going on the list.

I helped myself to a second helping of Costco potato salad as my dessert. It was almost as tasty. Just minus the four sticks of butter.

Then we came home, put the kids to bed and watched another episode of “The Pitch.” Did you really think we did something different?